A sister mind-reading act is drawn to a Swiss mountain where mountain climbers are being decapitated. Turns out that giant aliens with prominent eyeballs are invading the earth in big cheap cloud effects and spend their time lopping off heads and teasing the nearby observatory. The doctor, played by Forrest Tucker, shows up and sets himself up as the man in charge, until they're all trapped in the observatory and have to have the place bombed by a UN plane, I think.

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Here's what happens: a boat sinks, so a couple guys lose a dance contest and decide to break onto a boat that belongs to a thief. He's just committed a crime, so allows them to stay so that one of them can hijack the boat. The boat sinks, they wash up on shore, discover an evil military organization trying to build nuclear weapons, and also spot some natives grinding yellow stuff, while other natives do interpretive dance for Mothra. They then awaken Godzilla, who beats the shit out of the Sea Monster, but not before it kills all the bad guys. The island blows up as Mothma saves all the good people with one tiny little net while Godzilla just stands there looking stupid.

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Nuclear testing underground pisses off the goofily-dressed people of Seatopia, whose leader looks like Tim Conway's Dorf character. They send out their thugs, including Oscar Wilde, to steal a robot being built by a guy who lives with his secret agent-style best friend and his kid brother who wears tiny shorts and possibly nylons. To cinch the deal, Megalon is sent in to blow the crap out of Japan, so Godzilla comes and beats the crap out of him instead. This does not really convey all the weirdness of this movie.

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An International Taskforce of World Scientists Working For the Betterment of Mankind is assembled and stuffed into a rocket and sent to Venus. Turns out the explosion from space that hit Siberia in the early twentieth century was a Venusian spaceship. The team deciphers the message on the way and it turns out the Venusians were planning to take over Earth, but they didn't bother because it seems they were all killed by a nuclear explosion when their toilet backed up.

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Yet another Lippert film, this time about four scientists (two men and two women) who travel to another planet that looks just like Earth, see giant stuff, and then nuke an island for no reason. The real gem, however, is the short X Marks The Spot, which I cannot properly do justice. It's about how New Jersey drivers need to stop killing themselves with reckless driving, and includes God presiding over a court in a skating rink and an angel who looks like a Vegas legbreaker. Rent the Shorts video from Netflix with this, you won't be disappointed.

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Near as I can tell, the plot is that a snitch inside a biker gang fakes his own death, but is killed for real by a sniper. This causes Ross "Sidehackers" Hagen to come avenge his brother's death by joining the biker gang and we spend about two thirds of them film watching them either ride their bikes or act like high/drunken idiots while bad music plays. This film borders on being a war crime.

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Rock climbing. A scientist who's sometimes a Nazi, sometimes a Russian, designs a rocket, but the thing crashes in the middle of nowhere. As head of the project, naturally he has to go into the field to retrieve it along with his two flunkies, one of whom is the dad from Leave It To Beaver, flown there by Caesar Romero and another guy, and failed comic relief by Sid Melton, aka, Monkey Boy. Because the film does not have a real story, roughly forty percent of it is just of people climbing fake sets or walking through fake jungles. Includes the hilarious image of man-eating apotosaurs and triceratops done in the typical stop-motion animation of the time.

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An exceedingly long bit with a guy in a funeral home as host bookends this lame story. The story is about med students who all appear to be in their forties or older trying to get into a fraternity. Our hero, Harold Moffitt, was traumatized by his mother when, as a child, she said that if he didn't stop asking for the light to be kept on the night his grandad's body was in the living room that the body would get up and give him a licking. Shockingly this perfectly normal parenting has kind of f**ked this guy up.

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The lesson of the Cold War is that despite how effective and clever our spies are, they're still not enough to stop the Russkies from nuking Manhattan with a missile. I'm not sure what kind of propaganda that is - I guess they would have succeeded if we all just hated communism a little more. It's surprising too how badly our spies botched it; I mean, the base with this super missile has an open gate with just one guard on duty. It's less well guarded than a parking garage. And yet, our hero still fails, and a man in New York has his tie destroyed.

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George Reeves and a guy with a thin mustache head off into darkest Africa searching for a missing girl so they can get a big reward. Because Africa is only about six miles wide, they quickly find her, being treated like a goddess because she's white. Well, within minutes of arriving mustache shoots a native for no good reason, and everyone is surprised that he receives a death sentence for, you know, murder. Includes the first episode of the serial, The Phantom Creeps, starring Bela Legosi in the surprising role of a mad scientist.

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Ator and his sidekick Dong (aka Thong, aka Wong, aka Gomez) must travel from the ends of the Earth (aka Canada) to the palace of the Great One (aka The Really Dull Old Guy) to stop the villain (aka John Saxon) from stealing the geometric nucleus (aka the A-bomb). Highlights include cannibal cave dwellers, poorly dressed samarai, a giant sockpuppet, and Ator constructing a perfectly functioning hang glider in about five minutes.

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A really bad race car driver is asked by the cops to infiltrate a crappy motorcycle gang and watch them commit crimes.

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Trouble in Catalina when somebody does something involving some damn scroll and there's a lot of scuba diving and dancing and, aw hell, you figure it out.

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The dopey sport of sidehacking is put on display. For any joy you might have left, the reprehensible JC spends the rest of the movie killing people until Rommel kicks his butt.... and then JC kills him too.

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Five astronauts (Lloyd Bridges, a cowardly astronomer, an ice queen, the Walt Disney look-alike leader, and a Texan with a neck so red it probably glows in the dark) take the first rocket to go to the moon. They screw up, fly to Mars instead, half of them die, and the rest perish when they run out of fuel and crash. Lloyd hits on the chick the entire trip.

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