OVEG: Endgame

Description: Voyager makes it home sixteen years in the future. Janeway is promoted to admiral and is the most decorated officer in all of Starfleet. As you can see, the Planet of the Apes is a more preferable future. As we glimpse further we see that everyone wears their pants in a really high grandpa-style. Barclay and Janeway now teach at the academy, Harry is the captain of the USS Rhode Island (snicker), and Tuvok is in an insane assylum. And there's some other glossing over but for the most part the focus is on Janeway and how totally awesome she is for stranding her crew for 23 years.

Skip back to the present, where Torres has several false labor pains in the baby sub-plot. Harry in the meantime has found a possible way home, but the presence of a Borg Cube deters Janeway. Seven has a blossoming relationship with Chakotay. All in all it's the same old same old.

Back to the future, and Janeway decides she's going to change everything. In a sub-plot whose only purpose is to kill time, Janeway steals Klingon technology and nearly gets her ass killed, but that doesn't stop Captain Harry Kim from proving he's still a big weinie. Meanwhile the Borg watch the whole thing with mild interest, much like the viewer. The two Janeways meet, discuss, fight, discuss, fight some more, and finally go inside the nebula to the wormhole only to see that it's not a wormhole, but a Borg Transwarp Hub which can take them nearly anywhere. This after Voyager succeeds in seriously kicking the Borg's ass and fighting their way to the Hub, when Captain Janeway decides to turn around and head right back out again, completely screwing everyone over just so she can get into a pissing contest with herself.

Admiral Janeway says Voyager should just go home, but Captain Janeway says they should destroy the Hub to hurt the Borg. Harry then steps forward and gives this stupid speech about maybe it's not about the destination, but about the journey. It's a complete pile of BS, and you can hear in Garret Wang's voice that even he can't believe he's got to say this crap. No, it's not about the journey you dumbass, it's about getting to where you were going, otherwise why are you going there in the first place?

So, faced with this moral dillemma Janeway, both of her, does what she always does: picks a third option that will satisfy both. So Admiral Janeway goes to the Borg and gets her ass assimilated so she can implant a techno-virus-oobee-doobee-program-thingie in them and destroys the Unicomplex while Voyager destroys the Hub and travels back home. The blow up a sphere at the end to try to bring some dramatic conclusion to the episode, but it falls short. And then, without any attempt at resolution, the episode ends with Voyager flying towards Earth.

Comments: Voyager ends as it lived: a disappointment. We haven't had a really good final episode since Next Generation's All Good Things. First we have Deep Space Nine, which was going so well, and then we have a fifteen minute slow-motion montage to just fill out the episode. Poor planning, but one thing that was great about it was that the last ten or so episodes were all about closing the series out and tying up the loose ends. Voyager doesn't have that; instead we don't even have time for an epilogue. The questions on our mind for the past seven years, like the fate of the Maquis, or what will happen to Seven of Nine, or even Tom Paris, are all swept under the rug. For all we know Voyager was hit by an asteroid on its way back to Earth, that's how little resolution we have.

Now that brings me to the title: Endgame. What a lousy choice. All Good Things, What You Leave Behind, those are good names. Endgame again symbolizes Voyager: a plethora of one word titles for episodes. Just look at this season alone: Imperfection, Drive, Repression, Nightingale, Shattered, Lineage, Repentance, Prophecy, and Homestead. This fits right in with the first episode: Caretaker. Okay, sometimes it works, like "Jaws," but most other times it's just stupid or lazy: Macrocosm, Projections, Prototype, Meld, Lifesigns, Investigations, Innocence, Rise, Revulsion, Demon, Night, Gravity, Warhead, Riddles, and many, many more. In fact, the good ones are almost nil: One, Scorpion, um, Scorpion, Drone isn't too bad. But for the most part the titles of Voyager have been very uninspired.

Finally, where was Naomi? Why was Icheb given one little scene with zero closure? Why did the Borg have to be castrated like this? Why did the waste time with the Klingons? Why was the Doctor injecting Tuvok with liquid Skittles?

Special Kneebler Commentary: My favorite thing about this episode was Janeway arguing with herself. It might as well have not been two Janeways, but one Janeway talking to herself, expect if she had gotten into a fistfight with herself. It's just her way of disagreeing with everybody, having to pull rank on everybody, and being right all the time! And everybody means everybody, even herself.

As far as Neelix is concerned, see the Neelix Moment.

Rating: 4

Best Moment: Sad as it is, the best moment would have to be Tuvok ranting in the assylum like Rain Man as he scribbled on hamburger wrappers.

Seven of Nine Moment: The whole romance with Chakotay. Seven years to develop his character and we wait 'til the last episode. Would've worked even better if it didn't end so ambigiously. A close second goes to Seven's best set-up line: "I assume Starfleet will want to debrief me." Insert your own joke here.

Stupid Neelix Moment: Neelix made a single appearance over the comm channel. Now, there's not much going on here, but what is interesting is what happens at the end of his scene, when they're cut off. Seven says that she'll call him back tomorrow, but what happens? They're fighting the Borg! And then it's off to the Alpha Quadrant! Which leaves Neelix wondering what might have happened. The desidnated time arrives and leaves day after day with no answer. So, what does he do? Personally, I like the idea that he might go and check it out, right in the middle of a group of angry Borg. Just the thought brings a smile to my face. "You will be assimilated, shithead."

Continuity Question: All the time travel paradoxes. Also, Janeway says that she doesn't regret her decision to rescue the Ocampa's. Apparently she's changed her mind again, because in Night she realized it was a mistake.

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